A Job for Life

I served as escort for my son’s oral surgery last week. He is 29.

As I sat in the lobby, I had to restrain the urge to go back with him to the operating room.

He was nervous, I could sense it.

My maternal, nurturing instinct was kicking in; I figured I could hold his hand until he was sedated.


Age 5

I didn’t. But I surely wanted to.

He is a grown man, a young adult. But he is still my baby, my youngest.

It made me think of how that never changes. Being a mother, a parent, is a job that never really ends.

I’m not sure I thought much of that when starting a family. I wonder how many young men and women do ?

I understand my 86 year old mother- in -law, as she advises her son to not make the drive if there is snow in the forecast.

She worries.

It’s just part of the job.

This entry was posted in Childhood, Family, Random Thoughts and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

72 Responses to A Job for Life

  1. Erika Kind says:

    I think we only understand that once we have kids of our own! I experience exactly the same and I think every mother/father does. Once a parent – always a parent!

  2. Judy Martin says:

    I think as a mum, we will always be looking out for our kids, and trying to protect, and help them as much as we can, no matter how old they are 🙂

  3. I love this post Van! My oldest is 29 and when he was born I was so nervous and felt so worried and sometimes cried at night! my mom stayed with me and told me, don’t be so worried dear, this is the beginning and being a mother means you will always feel this way so you better relax! She was right!

  4. Nurse Kelly says:

    Aww – that photo is so cute! It’s so true that it doesn’t matter how old they get, we will always worry. And you know, deep down, that probably means a lot to your son. It’s not until it’s not there anymore that they miss it – the unchanging, unwavering love from a mother. He’s lucky to have you! xo

  5. Very true, Van. I remember the 95-year-old mother of a 70-year-old friend say “make sure you stay away from the sea and put plenty of sun-cream on” just before we all went off on holiday. I don’t think the ‘not worrying’ ever let’s go.

  6. Just Plain Ol' Vic says:

    Now that I am a parent, I totally get this.

  7. My good friend and I were just talking about this yesterday Van. They are always our babies and we always want to protect and take care of them. ❤
    Diana xo

  8. Amen. Not too long ago, my oldest was going through some stress and asked if we could go out to dinner. During the course of our chat, she blurted out, “God, I’m 34 years old and I’m still running to my mother.” Yep, that’s what it’s all about. I’m 63, and I miss my mother every single day. When she was 90 and in a hospital in another town, I went to visit her, and she warned me about staying in a motel alone. Once a mom, always a mom.

    • It makes me wonder how my own mother would have aged, CM, we lost her at age 53. I never saw a wrinkle, a gray hair, didn’t see her go through menopause. So many things we missed. Like you, I think of her all the time. Thanks. 💕 And, as such, am grateful that I’m still here to see my own kids mature. ☺

  9. Well said, Van. One of my adult children finds she has to remind me not to “over mom” her.

  10. George says:

    First of all, that’s an adorable little boy there..:)
    You’re right, I don’t think many people who have children think they’ll be worrying about them in similar ways when they’re 30 or 40.
    But it never goes away, does it.

  11. C.E.Robinson says:

    Well said, Van! Yep, both my sons are middle-aged and I “worry” about them! Try to keep opinions to myself though, and talk things out with them with questions! Best for me to listen and be a sounding board! Have a great week! 💛 Elizabeth

  12. nancyruth says:

    I relate completely. My youngest in 29. While he was staying with me some weeks this winter, every time he’d go out I would ask if he had his keys, his wallet, and his phone. I then told him it was my job as his mother to worry.

  13. amaya911 says:

    I completely understand you. My son’s 10 right now. I’m sure I’ll always worry about him. He’s the only one I have. A parent is always concerned no matter what age their child is.

  14. Outlier Babe says:

    Well, Van, this wasn’t the best post for me to come over to. But I of course get it, and am happy you and your son have a normal, healthy, loving relationship–the way it should be. X O

  15. What a wonderful photo of your son! And, a beautiful post…love never stops. 🙂

  16. Hello It’s Me
    I love the song from her last album. Her voice is mesmerizing.
    Great post! A horribe mother would think differently, thank goodness there are more loving mothers out there.
    I feel like my two dogs are family, we talk to them like they understand.
    Have a great evening.

  17. I am just at the beginning of this job – my oldest is 2 1/2. But I can’t imagine not worrying about, caring for, and trying to protect my girls—even when I’m 100!

  18. TanGental says:

    I suppose I first understood this from the other side in that as soon as I returned home I reverted to type. Mum cooked and I ate. It took my wife to point out I wasn’t helping. Even in her 80s I found this hard to reconcile this utge to maintain our roles. She never stopped checking I’d tucked my shirt in

  19. gingerfunk78 says:

    Oh good! Makes me feel a little better about my baby turning 18 in less than 2 weeks…He will always be my pooky bear. 🙂

  20. Oh gosh. So true, Van. My 80-year-old mother still thinks I’m too young to drive and my 32-year-old daughter is way too young to be a mom! I think it might be universal 🙂

  21. nimi naren says:

    Totally…once a mom, always a mom☺

  22. True dat! There is not a day that goes by that I don’t think about each one of my kids multiple times and send some prayers up. It’s a good thing I stopped at two or I’d never get anything else done! 🙂

  23. Joanne Corey says:

    I realized that parenting was forever when my first child was born and my mom, besides worrying about her first grandchild, was also worried about me. My daughters are in their twenties, but I will always be mom…

  24. I try to baby my baby and she shuts me down really quick! LOL! It has to be on her terms and when she wants it. She is 40 years old. LOL!

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